Does high expectation from parents affect the children..

 

"You taught me to Walk

You taught me to Play

You taught me to be Independent

Allow me to choose my future holding your hands

Guide me not force me"

                                             - - Inner voice of a child

 

In the present era, parents decide the future of their children even before they take their first breath in the world. My son or daughter will become a doctor or engineer when they grow up is what many parents dream about. Expectations run so high among parents that it becomes a burden on the child. Every child has distinct characters and capabilities.

Some parents are even worse. They always compare their children with their neighbors, colleagues and relatives children. I would like to quote a funny incident, a friend of mine always used to compare his daughter's performance with his colleague's daughter's performance. She used to get lot of scolding from her parents until they discovered, his colleague's daughter is in 12^th grade and his daughter in 8^th grade. Though the incident is quiet funny, think about the stress the teenager might have gone through in handling expectations of her parents.

Many children lose direction when parents enforce their expectation on their children. Children cannot handle the stress as they are not mentally strong enough. Ask any parent why you want your child to be engineer, without hesitation they will reply “I wanted to be an engineer, I couldn’t achieve my dream, so I want by child to be an engineer”. Expectation run high.

How many parents dare to show their mark sheets to their children? Honestly many wouldn’t as they may not be excellent in their studies but project themselves as the best. It also doesn’t imply that if you have good grades you expect your child to get grades without knowing their abilities.

“Lot of parents will do anything for their kids, except let them be themselves”

 

Adding to the pity many parents want their children to excel in studies as well as sports, art, music, martial arts and the list goes on, which puts the children under tremendous workload and stress. To achieve excellence they don’t allow their children even to play outdoors, mingle with other neighborhood friends. Isn’t it so worrying?

Do you know the adverse effect of stress on a young kid?
Stress can lead to lack of concentration, poor IQ, behavioral issues, breakdown and in some cases provoke them to be arrogant and wild.

Everyone cannot be a topper or winner in every field. You can achieve excellence only when you do things which you’re interested in. Parents needs to measure and calibrate their expectations based on the capabilities of their children and avoid un-necessary expectations

“Beat the iron when it is hot… until it becomes hard but not until it breaks”

 

Parents always believe they know the route to success and force their children to follow the same route. Time has changed a lot, our new generations are no more interested in what has amazed us.

What is the right thing to do as parent?
Observe your child until age 10 for their interest, Mentor and mend them till the age of 15, at age 16 guide them and allow them to choose their own path. Be with them in the decision they make, encourage them, if they fall down swiftly hold their hands, watch your children raise and succeed.

Whom do you seek if you need help?
Teachers are the best to be contacted for help as they know the psychology and behavioral pattern of children more than anyone else. Counselors are also of great help, remember , not only the child, but also the parents needs counseling.  

This is the topic for the Junior Interclass debate in my daughter's school. I thought sharing the speech in the blog will be beneficial for many parents and children. She got 2nd best speaker award in the interclass debate.
If you have any views or experience do post in the comments which will be of great use for other readers.

" Together we make an better environment for out children"

Picture courtesy: Pictures are collected from internet. Thankful to whom so ever have created these great images

Allwyn's blog has many self-improvement, motivational and Inspiration blog articles. Get the latest update as soon as a new blog is posted by following the  blog directly or through social media accounts to get updates on the latest post



@blogtheJourney





Feel Free to share and comment .Do follow my blog and like us in Facebook @blogthejourney  page and keep updated of the latest article posted in the blog. You can also subscribe to RSS FEED to get the latest updates.

Alternatively you can follow me on Google + : Allwyn Chellakumar for latest updates in the blog

You can write to me in my email allwyn.chellakumar@gmail.com I would be more that happy to read you email and reply

                                                                        Blog By: Allwyn Chellakumar